I'M GOIN DOWN PUNCHIN

11-25-09...I'M GOIN DOWN PUNCHIN

I'm here writing this because I have much to say and here all my best acquaintances hopefully will see it.
I was talking to a friend about my health problems one day and we were discussing things that can maybe help. During the conversation I remember saying that my Daddy always said he wants to die with his boots on and I feel the same way. In other words I want to live till I die not vegetate to live. I want Biscuits and gravy with lots of bacon. I want chocolate cake, I want #2 Sonic Burgers, fries and a shake. My friend said something to the affect of, Do you want to live or die. I want to live until I die is my answer.
I watched my Mamma and many more over the years deteriorate from healthy and robust to skin and bones. It will happen! That's a fact. When we finally had to check Mamma in to a nursing home all she really wanted to eat was sausage gravy and biscuits. Well No Mrs Thomas You can't have that because of too much salt. You can't have that big red juicy piece of watermelon Mrs. Thomas, because you are restricted on fluids. It was the same thing day by day. My Mamma was very sick and had no appetite. She would eat only these things and enjoyed only these things. My Brother and I decided why let her lay there and starve because they had her foods restricted. DUH!! Answer is you don't. At least that was our answer. I told everyone who would listen,(and some who wouldn't) that we wanted my Mamma to have anything she would eat, no diets and restrictions. I took her a little bowl of watermelon one day and you would have thought I'd committed murder. OH NO, She can't have that. To heck she can't, Just try and stop her. Her Dr said, I'll take care of the Dr. Did that shorten her life? Maybe a little but Mamma lived till she died, she didn't starve.
My Daddy was dieing and he knew it. He wanted to come home from the hosp. To die with his boots on and Daddy got to live at home for one whole week. I cooked Daddy a steak and potatoes the night before he died. My Daddy was not eating, my Daddy wanted steak and potatoes. End of story.
One morning while I was in the hosp they brought me scrambled eggs and a biscuit for breakfast. I hadn't been eating anything but that morning I would have eaten those eggs if they would have allowed me just a bit of salt. Of course you know they wouldn't let me have it. So, No breakfast.
When The Dr's office called me last night and told me my kidneys are not functioning well and thus not able to pump all the fluids through I thought OK Here we go again! Now I'm not stupid enough to go in the kitchen and eat a box of salt but I will eat some salt. I wont eat as much salt and who knows I might get used to no salt in time but heck fire I weight 160lbs. And I saw my Mamma go from 160 lbs. To 136 lbs in 16 days. Mamma never gained a pound back but just kept going down. So when my Mamma looked like a skeleton lying there in bed and she wanted some sausage & gravy------ Well you know what happened. I just Pray that someone will do that for me.
So today, (or maybe years ago) I made up my mind, I don't care if I've got my boots on but I want to live till I die. Don't want to be deprived of the only things I like just to give me a few more, days/weeks/years? I want to enjoy every day I can and go down punchin' by golly! YEP!!

MY RED SHOES

11-5-09...MY RED SHOES

We didn't get shoes every time we had a whim then, but got them when we needed them. I had Church shoes, white in summer, black in winter, and school shoes. I needed school shoes badly I guess. Mamma was sick so Daddy took me to Dryers Shoe Store to buy my shoes.
I sat down and Daddy told the lady what we needed. Everyone knew the difference in Church and School shoes then even the clerks in the stores.
She brought out several pairs for Daddies inspection. I spotted a pair of red shoes and I wanted them. The lady put them on my foot and I knew right away they were too tight. I also knew that Daddy would squeeze them at the toes to see if they were long enough. I scrunched up my toes as far as I could and Daddy felt where my 'Toe' was and he was satisfied. I got my red shoes and had been wearing them to school for about two weeks. They really hurt my toes but I wasn't about to say anything.
One night I was sitting in the floor barefoot and Daddy said, "Clydene what is wrong with your toes"? "Nothing Daddy Why"? The jig was up. My toes were an awful sight I guess because Mamma and Daddy both had a fit as they examined my toes. When they figured out why Daddy said, "Clydene why in the world did you get those shoes if you knew they were going to hurt your feet"? I told him that I wanted those red shoes and I knew he wouldn't let me have them too little. Mamma and Daddy both told me ,"Clydene they had other sizes I'm sure. You could have still had the red shoes". Well heck fire I didn't even think of that. Shoot fire!
They couldn't afford another pair of shoes right then so My Auntie bought me another pair. No they were not the red shoes I wanted but I wore them anyway.
I was about nine then and should have known better but I wanted that pair of red shoes and cost my Parents more money later. GOOD GRIEF!!!

BOJANGLES

11-02-09...BOJANGLES

I was away for two days and nights. When I got home yesterday evening I was told that my Poodle Moses had not eaten or drank anything. He just sit where he could watch the road and waited for me. He has never done this before and it bothers me. He ate so much when I got home that he vomited it up last night.
This morning he is on my heels and I can't get out of his sight.
This made me remember a little stray dog I had in Missouri in the 80's. His name was BoJangles because he 'followed' the boys home they said. I made them leave him outside for five days and we put an add in the paper that we had found a dog. The boys fed him and made him a bed. He was a pitiful looking thing. Stringy hair and sad eyes. His belly drug the ground because there was about a foot of snow where we lived in Idaho.
After five days and no replies to our ads he was ours. We brought him in and gave him a good bath, brushed him shiny and called him BoJangles. He learned his name fast.
We noticed that he would not eat out of a bowl. We tried all kinds and he acted scared of it. We figuered that he had been whipped out of pet bowls in the neighborhood. The boys fed him by hand and I gave them a spoon to feed him soft foods. Yes! He ate right out of that spoon.
We took BoJangles to a vet and a groomer. They both estimated his age at 16.
We had BoJangles for 6 years while we traveled all over the US. He rode with us and seemed to love it. When we got near home he would stand up in the window and whine. He knew where he was.
I left him with our vet once when we were gone for two weeks. When we picked him up his eyes were swolen from crying. The Vets wife tried to get him to eat but he would not. He was sooo skinny. Took us a while to faten him back up. I never left him again.
BoJangles went blind and his kidneys failed. We had to have him put to sleep. Just broke all our hearts. He was a part of our family and we all loved him.