8-15-09...A MOUSE IN MY PANTS
I don't like those little critters called mice. If I see one it always startles the heck outta' me. I don't like the idea that those little varmits are scurrying all around my house and on my things. They just absolutely give me the creeps. During my first marriage I went to work. I had to get up at 3 AM every morning in order to be on the job at 5 AM. I tried to be quiet so I wouldn't wake my son and my husband and mostly dressed in the dark so I could stand by the wood stove in the winter. I laid out my clothes the night before on a chair so They would be there when I got ready.
One very cold snowy morning I was standing by the stove putting my clothes on. I had my bra and sweater on and was ready for my work pants. I put one leg in the pants, raised the other leg and was putting it in the other pant leg. About half way down I felt something furry and boy howdy it was wiggling. I tried to get my leg outta' there but I started stumbling. Instead of taking my leg out it went on down. I was standing on the pant leg at the bottom. By golly whatever was in there wanted out as much as I did and it was moving on I tell ya'.
Up and down my leg it was going, likity' split. In my stunned state of mind I went goofy. I mean I was goofy. If I hadn't of been goofy I would have sit down and stripped outta' them pants in a hurry now wouldn't I have? But I didn't do that. Heck fire no. I didn't do that!! Instead I headed for the door stumblin' along with my foot on the pant leg. How I did it I'll never know but I tore out on the deck, stepped in the snow, and down I went, still trapping that thing in my pants. Good Grief!! No one woke up and I was on my own. I finally figured out I had to get outta' them pants or that thing had to get outta' them pants. Didn't matter much which one but one of us had to go!!!
The porch light was on thank goodness. I must have turned it on but I can't remember doing it. I turned on my back and started wiggling' for all I was worth to get outta' them pants. That thing in my pants was wigglin' too and I was about to go crazy I think. Finally my pants were off and I saw a blasted ol' mouse scurrying off the deck. That thing was moving I'm here to tell ya'.
I took my aching body back in the house. I wasn't about to wear pants that a mouse had been in the leg of so I got another pair, got dressed and took off for work. Had no breakfast but I had a cup of coffee before the mouse in the pants episode started so that did me till dinner time. That's noon down my way ya' know.
I survived, the mouse survived, and I set mouse traps all over the place that night. YEP!! Don't want no more mice in my pants. NOPE!!
