2-14-11...FANCY FOOD
I love bananas anyway I can get them. I used to just live for my Mama's banana pudding. I eat southern. Always have always will. Until my second marriage I'd never been out of Arkansas except to Oklahoma to live a few times when a kid. If you want me to go to a steak house with you they better have some pork chops on the menu. My second husband seemed to be from a different world when it came to food. I couldn't cook most of the things he wanted so he cooked usually. I really hated that because I love to cook and I hated him being in my kitchen and me not getting to do anything but clean up.
We traveled a lot. We had a nice home in Kansas but weren't in it a lot. I hated that too because I'm a homebody not a traveler. When he wanted some pukey awful thing that he couldn't cook we went out. I didn't want to appear stupid so I tried things even though I didn't know what it was. It was all yuk.
One day his parents were visiting which was never a good experience anyway. I was not really good enough for their boy as far as they were concerned. Heck they said they couldn't ever understand what I was saying. That was probably a good thing sometimes. They all wanted to go to a big fancy restaurant. I hated it when I was dragged in a place like that. I'm country through and through. I don't need 6 forks and 5 spoons. I don't want a spoon handed to me that's been wrapped in a cloth to keep it cold. I jumped when I took it. Good Grief that was bad enough but when that waiter started scrambling around in my lap I protested only to find out he was putting my cloth napkin on my lap. Well I'm capable of putting a napkin in my lap thank you very much and I don't need it anyway. I was surprised that he didn't try to put a bib on me. I said try!!
They all ordered some fancy drink. I informed anyone who would listen that I didn't drink alcohol, never did, never will and that I wanted a big mug of sweet iced tea. They brought me a tiny cup of hot tea. Now I'm not so country that I don't drink hot tea, I love hot tea, but I wanted iced tea which I told him. He's beginning to ruffle my feathers a bit.
Finally they brought the menus and there was not a thing on that sucker that I would put in my mouth. I had learned my lesson before when I ordered something and they brought me a platter of worms and bugs. Nope I don't want to gag again in front of everyone. I looked at the dessert menu thinking I couldn't go wrong with that.
I ordered something called Bananas Flambe. Hey I love bananas this is gonna be good. The waiter pushed a little cart up beside the table so I could see and assembled the dessert . Heck Fire he even set the thing on fire. I'd heard of that but never thought it really happened.
Oh My Gosh, I thought I had died and gone to Heaven. That was the most delicious thing I ever put my mouth to. All caramelized and gooey and yummy. I savored every bite of that wonderful stuff. That little waiter came and brought me a box I suppose to put leftovers in. Leftovers? No leftovers. I devoured every scrumptious bite of that stuff. The waiter was not getting on my nerves anymore. In fact he was a cute boy. You might say handsome.
And about that time it hit me and I knew I wasn't gonna be able to get out of there on my own steam. I was dizzy and sick and miserable and mad at anyone in my way.
I don't remember much else till I woke up hours later with what they told me was a hangover. They were all delighted to tell me I had gotten drunk on my Bananas Flambe. They knew that was going to happen and let me go ahead and eat it on an empty stomach. I enjoyed the stuff, it was delicious, but nope I don't want any more. NOPE!!!
