OH FOR GOODNESS SAKE

3-20-09...OH FOR GOODNESS SAKE!!!

I want to tell you about my day. It was a few days ago but still fresh in my mind. What started out as a normal day ended up in the craziest day I've had in a long time.
I got up bright and early, had my coffee while I checked out everyone and everything on The Hill. Just a usual morning for me. I had my day planned and a mental list of all I was going to do. That was my first mistake. Planning a day in advance always seems to run amuck for me. I know better than to try and be organized so why in the heck do I try it?
After The hill time I went to the kitchen to cook breakfast. I got out the bacon and put 10 slices in the skillet to fry. Five for me and five for Don. I put another skillet on the stove with a little bit of corn oil and turned the burner on low. Put the bacon back in the refer and took out two big brown eggs. Very organized I'm a thinkin'. Saving steps and puttin' things away as I go. Just like my Mama taught me. Well I guess my nose was too high in the air from self pattin' on the back right then, cause I didn't see Moses's squeaky toy on the floor. I stepped on that sucker and it squeaked real loud. I threw up my hands and shrieked. Guess what? The eggs flew outta' my hands and hit the cabinets, dribbled on down to the floor and the shells wound up at my feet. Moses who is always at my feet got his share of spray. Now there is nothing in the world I hate more than cleaning up slimy egg. Yukky! But clean it up I did and it was scattered everywhere. Ok now I said to myself go get two more eggs. I hated to waste those farm grown big brown eggs but it was done now. Hey! I'm cool, I aint going nuts, or rantin' and ravin', At least not yet!!!
I got the eggs and very carefully brought them over to the skillet. Heck fire what is that smell! Oh no that cotton pickin' oil must be old cause it stinks to high heaven. Ok, no problem, I put the eggs on the counter and turn off the skillet. I'll have to clean it up later but right now get another skillet and put fresh oil in it from the new bottle I shoulda' used in the first place. Turned it on low and cracked the eggs in there to fry. I look over to my bacon and it has cooked so long on one side that it is stuck to the pan. Good bacon will stick if you don't watch it close and this was good lean bacon. I took care of that put some bread to toast, poured a glass of milk for me and a cup of coffee for Don. Heck I'm going now I thought and was beginning to feel real proud of myself again. Breakfast came out good and I had more coffee, got myself dressed and went on to the next item on my agenda which was stripping sheets from beds. I like to have fresh sheets and pj's and robe, the whole bit for bedtime. I hung my bedspreads out on the deck to air out. Boy I'm a gonna' sleep good tonight I thought.
My organization was going by the wayside fast though cause I was beginning to think I'd bit off more than I could chew in one day. My mental list was just too dang long.
By the time I got the beds all put back together nicely it was dinner time. Our noon meal is our big meal of the day and then snacking for supper. I was going to fix steak, potato salad, and broccoli. Well that didn't go well either, I made one mess after another but I wont go in to it all. Just suffice to say after supper that evening I was draggin' big time. I made my way back to The Hill for a while, watched some TV, then I was ready for a hot shower. But!!!! When I had put the last batch of clothes in the washer I had not remembered to put them in the dryer. My favorite clean sweet smelling PJ's were not dry. Well heck fire now I'm getting' flustered a bit. I had others but I wanted those to sleep in tonight. I put them in the dryer and waited for them to get dry. I was nodding now and my eyes were drooping on me. Didn't see how I was gonna' stay awake much longer.
Finally the dryer stopped. I got my pj's robe and underclothes and hurried in to the bathroom. Now folks here is where it gets really bad. I mean bad with a capital B and thats BAD. I usually put my night clothes on the closed commode while I am in the shower and that's what I did. Only trouble was , the lid was not closed on the commode. NOPE!!. My Pj's and my under clothes just soaked right on down in to the stool as slick as butter. YEP!!! Sure did! Good thing was I don't allow my toilet to go unflushed so it was clear water. I stood there stunned and watched this and then thats when I came unglued. I went totally berserk I mean off the wall. I was shaking and sobbing. Must not have been loud cause Don never even knew what happened, and if you tell him I'm gonna have to murder you in your sleep!!!! YEP!
I just got a trash bag and put the wet things in it dumped them in the washer, got more pj's and took a long hot shower. It was close to midnight when I got in bed but I slept like a hibernating bear. No one around here will ever hear this story so don't you breathe a word of it. OK?