10-18-10...I CAME IN KICKING AND SCREAMING
I was born on a hot August day in 1944. My Mama had kidney poisoning and almost died. I asked her one day, “Mama did I almost die as too”? “Heck no Clydene, she said, you came in to this world kickin' and screamim' and you haven't stopped since”!! When I think back on all the honery things I've done I know she was tellin' the truth when she said that. I must have been a mess all my life and with the help of my side-kick Brenda there was no stopping me. What a relief it must have been to our Mama's when we started to school. Out of their hair for a while. I figured they both sighed with relief every morning when we got on the school bus. Now I cried for a long time in school. Miss Sallie gave me lots of paddlins', shamed me to the others, ignored me and everything she could think of. Just didn't work. Mama would get me ready every morning and send me up the road to catch the bus. I tried and tried to sneak back to the house and 'miss' the bus. I knew there was no way for Mama to get me there if I missed the bus. That Woman always caught me and sent me right back up that road . Heck fire, I never got away with that even one time.
One night when Brenda stayed at my house I devised one of my brilliant plans. “Brenda we'll get sick and they wont make us go”. “How Clydene”? Well I had to think on that for a spell but I came up with a brilliant plan. YEP A Stupendous plan (as in stupid). Mama kept ex-lax for the obvious reasons. I knew that if she ate too many of them she had PROBLEMS!! I saw her do just that a few times and I knew she was , shall I say disabled? indisposed? for a while. “Heck Fire Brenda that'll do it. And they are chocolate and I bet they are good!!” EX-LAX came in a cute little blue box all wrapped up like a candy bar. Shoot I'd always wanted to taste them and I knew where she kept them too by golly. I got me a chair and climbed up to reach them on a shelf in the old pie safe. “Brenda it's a whole box”. “Recon how much we should eat” Brenda said. Well I heard Mama say she took too much so it must be a lot. Heck we just divided them and ate the whole durn box. That outta work. “Well shoot fire Brenda it aint working” I said sometime in the night. “Guess that aint'a'gonna keep us outta school after all. SHOOT!! Well I don't know how long it took but Yep it did work. It worked big time!! I woke up with the most awful ache in my stomach I ever had. “Oh Brenda, go get Mama, I'm sick!” “Clydene I'm sick too, You go get her”. “OOOHHH Brenda I'm dyin' I'm dyin' Get Mama Quick”. “I'm dyin' too Clydene. Whadda we a'gonna do”? Well we knew right away what we were gonna do. Yep no doubt about it. We knew. It lasted the rest of the night out in that ol' toilet. I was never so sick and by golly I didn't have to go to school either.
I'm quiet sure Mamma got a few more gray hairs that night. Oh I came in kicking and screaming all right and I'm still good at kicking an screaming by golly.
Monday, October 18, 2010
Sunday, October 17, 2010
MY ANGEL STORY
10-6-10...MY ANGEL STORY
I haven't shared this with very many people but I'd like to. I think everyone should know that things like this happen daily.
It was a Sunday morning just like any other. I was up getting ready to leave for Church when I started hurting in my chest. I checked my B/P and it scared the tar out of me when I saw it was 292/187. HIGH!!! I hollered at my Husband and told him I had to go to the hospital. He said he had to shave first. Yep! Sure did. So I waited.
At the Er they grabbed hold and I was surrounded in seconds. Hooked up to everything it seemed. They planned to stabilize me and air lift me to the cardiac wing in a larger hospital 50 miles away. Plans don't always come to completion because They could not get my B/P down. It wouldn't budge. Around noon they put me in ICU. I had a Private nurse who hovered. Oh, Did I mention I remained calm? Yep sure did!
I had drowsed and woke to the Nurse standing over me around 2AM I'm told. I said it is higher isn't It? She said Yes the Doctor is on his way. My Brother who lived only a few blocks away was already there. That room, which had seemed dark and tomb like, suddenly lit up bright. I looked up and I saw my Son , Who is in Heaven, as plain as I had seen him many times, looking at me. I wanted to hug him and I was trying to get to him but the vision vanished and another presence seemed to be standing at my side. It was very clear in my mind that I wasn't going to get to go to my Son, I was staying here. The Presence beside me was strong and it was peaceful. I don't remember anymore until the next day when they took me down to a private room. I was fine, my B/P was down. I was there three more days to get the B/P regulated and stable. What Happened? Nothing mysterious or spooky, but reality. I had a near death experience. I got a glimpse of my Son in Heaven but God wanted me to stay here. That's it, Simple. I'm Thankful!!
I haven't shared this with very many people but I'd like to. I think everyone should know that things like this happen daily.
It was a Sunday morning just like any other. I was up getting ready to leave for Church when I started hurting in my chest. I checked my B/P and it scared the tar out of me when I saw it was 292/187. HIGH!!! I hollered at my Husband and told him I had to go to the hospital. He said he had to shave first. Yep! Sure did. So I waited.
At the Er they grabbed hold and I was surrounded in seconds. Hooked up to everything it seemed. They planned to stabilize me and air lift me to the cardiac wing in a larger hospital 50 miles away. Plans don't always come to completion because They could not get my B/P down. It wouldn't budge. Around noon they put me in ICU. I had a Private nurse who hovered. Oh, Did I mention I remained calm? Yep sure did!
I had drowsed and woke to the Nurse standing over me around 2AM I'm told. I said it is higher isn't It? She said Yes the Doctor is on his way. My Brother who lived only a few blocks away was already there. That room, which had seemed dark and tomb like, suddenly lit up bright. I looked up and I saw my Son , Who is in Heaven, as plain as I had seen him many times, looking at me. I wanted to hug him and I was trying to get to him but the vision vanished and another presence seemed to be standing at my side. It was very clear in my mind that I wasn't going to get to go to my Son, I was staying here. The Presence beside me was strong and it was peaceful. I don't remember anymore until the next day when they took me down to a private room. I was fine, my B/P was down. I was there three more days to get the B/P regulated and stable. What Happened? Nothing mysterious or spooky, but reality. I had a near death experience. I got a glimpse of my Son in Heaven but God wanted me to stay here. That's it, Simple. I'm Thankful!!
Thursday, September 2, 2010
FLUFFY AND MISS PERSNICKETY
9-2-10...FLUFFY AND MISS PERSNICKETY
I'm sure you've all been around a persnickety person or two. One of my Aunts was the worlds worst. She didn't like animals of any kind, She didn't like to come to our house because we weren't prim and proper like she was, She would dissect her food if she did happen to eat with us looking for what I don't know, Before she would sit she would look and swipe like she thought there was vermin on our chairs. I don't think she liked kids at all even her own. I didn't like her much but she was my Daddies sister and we had to tolerate her now and then, especially since we would never go to her house where we weren't proper enough and miserable while there.
We had chickens and Daddy let them out to run a while about dusk and they would go back into roost and be fenced back up. Of course every time the old bag came she stepped in some chicken poop. Someone gave me what was called a fancy feather legged rooster. It had a fluffy top comb all white and lacey and fluffy feathers on it's legs and feet. Very pretty and probably not much good for anything but I had raised it and I loved it. It would fly up and sit on my shoulder for long times. It liked everyone but we had a special bond.
One day the Aunt had seen fit to grace us with her presence for which we were supposed to be eternally grateful . I was outside of course and my rooster was with me. She made a big fuss about me playing with a 'dirty chicken'. Daddy told her not to bother herself with what any of us did and mind her own business. He wasn't fooling with her nonsense.
It bothered me that she didn't like me and I wanted to find something to make her like me. I thought maybe she'd like to see my pretty rooster a little closer so I put Fluffy on my shoulder and in the house I strutted with a big smile on my face. I said before Fluffy liked everyone and he did. When old persnickety saw Fluffy she came unglued. The old hag started screeching and running around like the crazy woman that she was and scared the dickens out of Fluffy. He hadn't ever seen anyone like that so all he knew to do was go on the attack. You know,, Get her before she gets me? He flew off my shoulder and smack dad on hers or I think that was what he intended but he got all tangled up in that birds nest hairdo of hers and down that mop came in her face. She couldn't see but she was running around like a chicken with it's head cut off (No not you Fluffy)
Daddy caught Fluffy and handed him to me and said to take him outside. I thought I was in a lot of trouble when I saw the aunt take off to her car and get out of there. When I went back in the house I told Daddy that I didn't mean to scare her I just wanted her to like me. Daddy told me not to bring Fluffy in the house anymore and that was all he said. Sometime after that I found out that Daddy had been upset with his Sister for the way she had treated us all. I don't know what he had said to her but she acted better the next time we saw her. I heard Daddy say one day that he could take it but by golly his kids didn't have to take it and he was not going to put up with it. I didn't really know what he meant then. BUT I Do Now.
I'm sure you've all been around a persnickety person or two. One of my Aunts was the worlds worst. She didn't like animals of any kind, She didn't like to come to our house because we weren't prim and proper like she was, She would dissect her food if she did happen to eat with us looking for what I don't know, Before she would sit she would look and swipe like she thought there was vermin on our chairs. I don't think she liked kids at all even her own. I didn't like her much but she was my Daddies sister and we had to tolerate her now and then, especially since we would never go to her house where we weren't proper enough and miserable while there.
We had chickens and Daddy let them out to run a while about dusk and they would go back into roost and be fenced back up. Of course every time the old bag came she stepped in some chicken poop. Someone gave me what was called a fancy feather legged rooster. It had a fluffy top comb all white and lacey and fluffy feathers on it's legs and feet. Very pretty and probably not much good for anything but I had raised it and I loved it. It would fly up and sit on my shoulder for long times. It liked everyone but we had a special bond.
One day the Aunt had seen fit to grace us with her presence for which we were supposed to be eternally grateful . I was outside of course and my rooster was with me. She made a big fuss about me playing with a 'dirty chicken'. Daddy told her not to bother herself with what any of us did and mind her own business. He wasn't fooling with her nonsense.
It bothered me that she didn't like me and I wanted to find something to make her like me. I thought maybe she'd like to see my pretty rooster a little closer so I put Fluffy on my shoulder and in the house I strutted with a big smile on my face. I said before Fluffy liked everyone and he did. When old persnickety saw Fluffy she came unglued. The old hag started screeching and running around like the crazy woman that she was and scared the dickens out of Fluffy. He hadn't ever seen anyone like that so all he knew to do was go on the attack. You know,, Get her before she gets me? He flew off my shoulder and smack dad on hers or I think that was what he intended but he got all tangled up in that birds nest hairdo of hers and down that mop came in her face. She couldn't see but she was running around like a chicken with it's head cut off (No not you Fluffy)
Daddy caught Fluffy and handed him to me and said to take him outside. I thought I was in a lot of trouble when I saw the aunt take off to her car and get out of there. When I went back in the house I told Daddy that I didn't mean to scare her I just wanted her to like me. Daddy told me not to bring Fluffy in the house anymore and that was all he said. Sometime after that I found out that Daddy had been upset with his Sister for the way she had treated us all. I don't know what he had said to her but she acted better the next time we saw her. I heard Daddy say one day that he could take it but by golly his kids didn't have to take it and he was not going to put up with it. I didn't really know what he meant then. BUT I Do Now.
Tuesday, August 31, 2010
SUMMERTIME
8-29-10...SUMMERTIME
My Brother Norman and I used to sleep outside when it got so terribly hot. We didn't have AC I doubt anyone did then. Probably if they did they were way above us monetarily. We didn't even have a small fan of any kind. We had a quilt that we used as a pallet outside. Often one of us would go to the other in the night and say, "Lets go out in the yard to sleep". Up we'd jump an off we'd go to the front yard and lay out our pallet under the big cedar tree. Looking back I can't understand why we picked that tree. It was usually full of bugs that would fall on us and the foliage was stickery to say the least. That was the place we picked for whatever reason. It's a wonder a snake hadn't crawled on us. OOOH It scares me to think of that now. Isn't it amazing how resilient kids are?
One night it was so hot we couldn't really get cool even outside but I did eventually go to sleep. Sweat was running down my face in rivulets. My hair was wet and sticky. Sometime later I woke and the sweat was running off my nose and it tickled. I reached up to wipe my face and one big drop of sweat didn't feel right. It was too big an too solid to be sweat for one thing. Second thing was how it moved when I swipe my hand over it. UH OH, that was live. I thought probably a baby bird had fell out of it's nest in the tree so I cupped it in my hands and elbowed Norman. "Wake up Norman, we've gotta put this baby back in his nest". He said, "We can't see to do that tonight Sister we'll have to wait till morning". "What are we gonna do with it now". While we talked it over I got tired of holding the bird and asked Norman to take it. He reached out and I opened my hands for him to take it. Well By Golly that blamed baby bird hopped out of my hands and on to my bare leg. WOOPS! "Noooorrrrmmmmaaannn, That aint no bird". "What is it then?" Well let me tell you I had figured out by then what it was and it sure weren't gonna stay on me. No Sir Ee. I couldn't move that fast now if my life depended on it but I was on the porch in a couple of jumps screaming to the top of my lungs. "A FROG, A FROG, Oh My God a frog". Norman wouldn't laugh at me for being scared of a frog, because he remembered putting one on me once and I almost passed out, but he was trying to tell me it was only a little ol' tree frog no bigger than my Daddies thumb. Didn't matter to me how big, A frog is a frog is a frog and I hate frogs. I opened the screen door and hit the solid wall that was my Daddies chest. Knocked the wind out of me but I was moving on.
Norman had to promise me that he'd keep all frogs off me before I went out again and I wouldn't go that night at all.
Good Grief, Can you see a kid now lying down in the yard like that right out in the open with no cover except a cedar tree?
My Brother Norman and I used to sleep outside when it got so terribly hot. We didn't have AC I doubt anyone did then. Probably if they did they were way above us monetarily. We didn't even have a small fan of any kind. We had a quilt that we used as a pallet outside. Often one of us would go to the other in the night and say, "Lets go out in the yard to sleep". Up we'd jump an off we'd go to the front yard and lay out our pallet under the big cedar tree. Looking back I can't understand why we picked that tree. It was usually full of bugs that would fall on us and the foliage was stickery to say the least. That was the place we picked for whatever reason. It's a wonder a snake hadn't crawled on us. OOOH It scares me to think of that now. Isn't it amazing how resilient kids are?
One night it was so hot we couldn't really get cool even outside but I did eventually go to sleep. Sweat was running down my face in rivulets. My hair was wet and sticky. Sometime later I woke and the sweat was running off my nose and it tickled. I reached up to wipe my face and one big drop of sweat didn't feel right. It was too big an too solid to be sweat for one thing. Second thing was how it moved when I swipe my hand over it. UH OH, that was live. I thought probably a baby bird had fell out of it's nest in the tree so I cupped it in my hands and elbowed Norman. "Wake up Norman, we've gotta put this baby back in his nest". He said, "We can't see to do that tonight Sister we'll have to wait till morning". "What are we gonna do with it now". While we talked it over I got tired of holding the bird and asked Norman to take it. He reached out and I opened my hands for him to take it. Well By Golly that blamed baby bird hopped out of my hands and on to my bare leg. WOOPS! "Noooorrrrmmmmaaannn, That aint no bird". "What is it then?" Well let me tell you I had figured out by then what it was and it sure weren't gonna stay on me. No Sir Ee. I couldn't move that fast now if my life depended on it but I was on the porch in a couple of jumps screaming to the top of my lungs. "A FROG, A FROG, Oh My God a frog". Norman wouldn't laugh at me for being scared of a frog, because he remembered putting one on me once and I almost passed out, but he was trying to tell me it was only a little ol' tree frog no bigger than my Daddies thumb. Didn't matter to me how big, A frog is a frog is a frog and I hate frogs. I opened the screen door and hit the solid wall that was my Daddies chest. Knocked the wind out of me but I was moving on.
Norman had to promise me that he'd keep all frogs off me before I went out again and I wouldn't go that night at all.
Good Grief, Can you see a kid now lying down in the yard like that right out in the open with no cover except a cedar tree?
GROUCHY
8-29-10...GROUCHY
Someone called me grouchy this morning and my first thought was to tell her off good. How dare she call me grouchy. HOW DARE SHE. Now usually I would bristle up like an old settin' hen and my claws would be out. The fact that I thought before I acted was new. My Mamma taught me to always think before I open my mouth to spew out fire. I know the rules but down through the years sometime I left that wisdom far behind. I thought, Hey I knew how it was done and somewhere in the deep recesses of my mind it got out again. The fact is that I have been very grouchy lately. Very Grouchy!! The thought right after that piece of wisdom is that I have reason to be grouchy but that doesn't count for much when there are so many others in the same boat with me. If we don't start THINKING before we speak we are going to sink the boat now aren't we?
Mamma didn't just say think before you speak either. She said 'Think about what that person has on their mind when they grouched at you and what might have happened to them that made them that way. Don't take for granted that everything is OK with them because It might not be'.
We just can't know what others have to deal with at any given time. We can't look inside their minds and even begin to understand the problems, hurts, or heartaches that are there ready to surface.
We all need someone that we can confide in. Someone who loves us just for us. Someone who will stand beside you and uphold you. Love us when we are un-lovable as I have been lately. Someone like that is a true friend. We can pick out our true friends fast when we are troubled, They stay by your side. They wont say "you are grouchy" they will say "What's wrong, can I help"? They never say that don't make sense. They don't offer advise unless you ask for advice. They won't say anything, they will just sit quietly by, cry with you just the way they laugh with you. That's a friend. I have many friends but only a few REAL FRIENDS. I should have thought about that before I said anything to her in the first place this morning. She is not a friend. So if she calls me grouchy so what? I probably wouldn't have been grouchy with a friend this morning. So when someone is grouchy with me the way I was this morning I'm going to try and stop and think before I let it bother me from now on. At least I hope I will. TEE HEE
Someone called me grouchy this morning and my first thought was to tell her off good. How dare she call me grouchy. HOW DARE SHE. Now usually I would bristle up like an old settin' hen and my claws would be out. The fact that I thought before I acted was new. My Mamma taught me to always think before I open my mouth to spew out fire. I know the rules but down through the years sometime I left that wisdom far behind. I thought, Hey I knew how it was done and somewhere in the deep recesses of my mind it got out again. The fact is that I have been very grouchy lately. Very Grouchy!! The thought right after that piece of wisdom is that I have reason to be grouchy but that doesn't count for much when there are so many others in the same boat with me. If we don't start THINKING before we speak we are going to sink the boat now aren't we?
Mamma didn't just say think before you speak either. She said 'Think about what that person has on their mind when they grouched at you and what might have happened to them that made them that way. Don't take for granted that everything is OK with them because It might not be'.
We just can't know what others have to deal with at any given time. We can't look inside their minds and even begin to understand the problems, hurts, or heartaches that are there ready to surface.
We all need someone that we can confide in. Someone who loves us just for us. Someone who will stand beside you and uphold you. Love us when we are un-lovable as I have been lately. Someone like that is a true friend. We can pick out our true friends fast when we are troubled, They stay by your side. They wont say "you are grouchy" they will say "What's wrong, can I help"? They never say that don't make sense. They don't offer advise unless you ask for advice. They won't say anything, they will just sit quietly by, cry with you just the way they laugh with you. That's a friend. I have many friends but only a few REAL FRIENDS. I should have thought about that before I said anything to her in the first place this morning. She is not a friend. So if she calls me grouchy so what? I probably wouldn't have been grouchy with a friend this morning. So when someone is grouchy with me the way I was this morning I'm going to try and stop and think before I let it bother me from now on. At least I hope I will. TEE HEE
Thursday, August 19, 2010
I DON'T UNDERSTAND
8-19-10...I DON'T UNDERSTAND
School is starting up today in the schools here. I imagine it is the same almost everywhere. I couldn't help the thought that came to my mind about those poor little babies in the lower grades. My first thought was , 'Oh My Goodness I hope no one leaves their child locked in their car all day and forgets them'. That happens so much it seems. Poor little trusting kids dependent on their parent or care giver. I just can't comprehend a parent, especially a Mother, going about their business all day and forgetting their child in the car. Last year even a Teacher in this area did that very thing. Her child was so blessed that a cousin was coming to school and saw the baby sitting there cooking in that hot car. It has actually been happening all summer around here and almost everywhere else.
We have an excessive heat warning today. How long would a small child have to suffer? What in the world is going on with people now? It is not just babies dying in hot cars, they are raped, kidnapped and murdered, drown and pushed in a big body of water strapped in car seats. Small children raped and murdered by big men who are sex offenders. What makes that worse is that these perverts get out of jail almost as soon as they are convicted. It just makes me sick to my stomach and mad as heck. These people should never have kids at all. I don't understand why they don't just give them up for adoption by someone who really wants a child. My heart just breaks even thinking about this. What in the vworld is going to be done about this?
School is starting up today in the schools here. I imagine it is the same almost everywhere. I couldn't help the thought that came to my mind about those poor little babies in the lower grades. My first thought was , 'Oh My Goodness I hope no one leaves their child locked in their car all day and forgets them'. That happens so much it seems. Poor little trusting kids dependent on their parent or care giver. I just can't comprehend a parent, especially a Mother, going about their business all day and forgetting their child in the car. Last year even a Teacher in this area did that very thing. Her child was so blessed that a cousin was coming to school and saw the baby sitting there cooking in that hot car. It has actually been happening all summer around here and almost everywhere else.
We have an excessive heat warning today. How long would a small child have to suffer? What in the world is going on with people now? It is not just babies dying in hot cars, they are raped, kidnapped and murdered, drown and pushed in a big body of water strapped in car seats. Small children raped and murdered by big men who are sex offenders. What makes that worse is that these perverts get out of jail almost as soon as they are convicted. It just makes me sick to my stomach and mad as heck. These people should never have kids at all. I don't understand why they don't just give them up for adoption by someone who really wants a child. My heart just breaks even thinking about this. What in the vworld is going to be done about this?
Monday, July 26, 2010
A TRAGEDY
7-25-10...A TRAGEDY
I know for a fact that even with the had things we went through as kids we were still some of the most Blessed kids in the world. Thinking what others my age had to endure then just brings that home to me more.
There was another house that was right on the tracks like ours. I had a friend who lived in that house and I could walk up the RR right of way and go there in about 10 minutes. I visited her often and I can see that house like it was yesterday. It was fairly large and good thing it was because they had 10 kids in that house. My Friend, (I'll call her Ella) lived there with that huge family and she was the baby of the group. We were probably about 10 then. She and Brenda never developed the friendship that I had with Ella.
Ella's Mom and Dad were jolly and good but never had the time they needed to spend with their kids even though you could see the love they had for them. The older ones took care of the younger ones mostly. There was only one boy in the whole 10 of them and he stayed in the woods for reasons obvious.
Ella's Daddy was a farmer and he worked hard just like my Daddy did in the coal mine. He was a big man. He had an old tractor that had seen it's better days. He was out on the tractor cutting hay one day at dinner time and Ella's Mamma sent us to take him water and food.
He was quiet a ways from the house and as we got closer we could hear the tractor running and see smoke rising in the air.
We never suspected anything was wrong and just took our time getting there. What we saw when we did get there was the tractor burning. We didn't see her Dad at first but as we ran closer the tractor exploded and we say her Dad crawling toward a little creek close by. His clothes were on fire and he was screaming. Never before or since have I heard such a sound. A high pitched moan. The grass was on fire but wasn't spreading much because it was green.
We ran on to the creek and her Dad was lying in the edge of the water and he was quiet. The smell still haunts me sometimes. Mostly the memory has been blocked out of my mind. Very seldom does it come back.
Her Dad was already gone but we really didn't know that. He was black and charred.
WE ran back to the house as fast as we could get there and told what we could. Ella's Mom sent me home and told me to go to the only neighbor who had a car and ask for help. I did that and the people sped off in their car.
I went home and it took me a while but I told Mamma what had happened.
All the neighbors walked up the track to try and help. All of us kids stayed together in one house with older ones to watch us.
Ella and her family moved away after that and I never saw them again but I know, now even better than then, how hard they must have had it in years to come.
The house sold and the new family were middle aged with no kids. Mamma went up the track from time to time and visited with the woman but I never wanted to go with her.
It was a terrible thing to happen and made my Parents seem even more precious to me.
I know for a fact that even with the had things we went through as kids we were still some of the most Blessed kids in the world. Thinking what others my age had to endure then just brings that home to me more.
There was another house that was right on the tracks like ours. I had a friend who lived in that house and I could walk up the RR right of way and go there in about 10 minutes. I visited her often and I can see that house like it was yesterday. It was fairly large and good thing it was because they had 10 kids in that house. My Friend, (I'll call her Ella) lived there with that huge family and she was the baby of the group. We were probably about 10 then. She and Brenda never developed the friendship that I had with Ella.
Ella's Mom and Dad were jolly and good but never had the time they needed to spend with their kids even though you could see the love they had for them. The older ones took care of the younger ones mostly. There was only one boy in the whole 10 of them and he stayed in the woods for reasons obvious.
Ella's Daddy was a farmer and he worked hard just like my Daddy did in the coal mine. He was a big man. He had an old tractor that had seen it's better days. He was out on the tractor cutting hay one day at dinner time and Ella's Mamma sent us to take him water and food.
He was quiet a ways from the house and as we got closer we could hear the tractor running and see smoke rising in the air.
We never suspected anything was wrong and just took our time getting there. What we saw when we did get there was the tractor burning. We didn't see her Dad at first but as we ran closer the tractor exploded and we say her Dad crawling toward a little creek close by. His clothes were on fire and he was screaming. Never before or since have I heard such a sound. A high pitched moan. The grass was on fire but wasn't spreading much because it was green.
We ran on to the creek and her Dad was lying in the edge of the water and he was quiet. The smell still haunts me sometimes. Mostly the memory has been blocked out of my mind. Very seldom does it come back.
Her Dad was already gone but we really didn't know that. He was black and charred.
WE ran back to the house as fast as we could get there and told what we could. Ella's Mom sent me home and told me to go to the only neighbor who had a car and ask for help. I did that and the people sped off in their car.
I went home and it took me a while but I told Mamma what had happened.
All the neighbors walked up the track to try and help. All of us kids stayed together in one house with older ones to watch us.
Ella and her family moved away after that and I never saw them again but I know, now even better than then, how hard they must have had it in years to come.
The house sold and the new family were middle aged with no kids. Mamma went up the track from time to time and visited with the woman but I never wanted to go with her.
It was a terrible thing to happen and made my Parents seem even more precious to me.
Friday, July 23, 2010
Daydreams of Yesterday With Gratitude
7-22-10...Daydreams of Yesterday With Gratitude
It seems like most days now I go running down that dirt road that leads to a dead end. There is black shale on that road and I am barefoot. I don't notice the sharp shale grinding in to my feet or that my feet have become black and maybe hot from the sunshine. All I see is two houses to the left of me and a train going by on the track at the very end. The house's are very close, In hollering distance. There might be a couple of kids in each yard but most likely there will be four kids in one of the yards together. Sometimes those kids might be squabbling over something but most times they are laughing and playing together.
As I get a little closer my heart beats in anticipation and fills with longing to hurry and be there in their midst. A big Collie dog with a limp comes to welcome me with his tail wagging so fast that his whole body is moving.
At the second house I see a woman on the porch calling to the kids to come on in “supper's ready”. She doesn't have to persuade them much, they've been playing hard all day and they are hungry.
I think to myself, Well she didn't ask me but she looks so welcoming I know she won't mind so I go on in and get ready for supper with all the rest. There are some more folks who also come to the door and they are welcomed as the Woman says 'Sit down and I'll get you a plate. There is plenty.
There is a square home made table that I know that kind tired looking man made with his hammer, hand saw, and nails. An oilcloth is covering the rough lumber. It has yellow daisies covering it and I think it is so pretty.
On the table is a large pan of pinto beans with some kind of meat in them sometimes but usually not. There is a huge bowl of fried potatoes and I know no one will ever fry potatoes as good as those. A big skillet of cornbread sits on a dishrag piping hot, a bowl of red sliced onions and that is usually all there is.
The floor of the kitchen is not level. In fact the table is slanted so far on the uneven floor that the girl knocks over a glass of something and it runs right down in to the lap of the man across from her. He jumps up and the lady starts cleaning up the mess.
I'm thinking, Boy that girl is in trouble now but strangely the man and woman just smile at her and say “Eat your supper honey, and be more careful”.
What a beautiful scene all of this is as it flashes through my mind. So real that I can feel the dirt on my feet and smell the beans and cornbread, fried taters and red onions. Only to realize that here I sit looking out at a very different scene, and none of that is real. Kind of sad until I remember that I can go again anytime I wish and once again be drawn in to that wonderful place that I can call mine. This makes me smile as my heart fills with such wonderful memories of a place exactly like that. Knowing that I grew up there and it all was and is mine makes me overflow with gratitude.
It seems like most days now I go running down that dirt road that leads to a dead end. There is black shale on that road and I am barefoot. I don't notice the sharp shale grinding in to my feet or that my feet have become black and maybe hot from the sunshine. All I see is two houses to the left of me and a train going by on the track at the very end. The house's are very close, In hollering distance. There might be a couple of kids in each yard but most likely there will be four kids in one of the yards together. Sometimes those kids might be squabbling over something but most times they are laughing and playing together.
As I get a little closer my heart beats in anticipation and fills with longing to hurry and be there in their midst. A big Collie dog with a limp comes to welcome me with his tail wagging so fast that his whole body is moving.
At the second house I see a woman on the porch calling to the kids to come on in “supper's ready”. She doesn't have to persuade them much, they've been playing hard all day and they are hungry.
I think to myself, Well she didn't ask me but she looks so welcoming I know she won't mind so I go on in and get ready for supper with all the rest. There are some more folks who also come to the door and they are welcomed as the Woman says 'Sit down and I'll get you a plate. There is plenty.
There is a square home made table that I know that kind tired looking man made with his hammer, hand saw, and nails. An oilcloth is covering the rough lumber. It has yellow daisies covering it and I think it is so pretty.
On the table is a large pan of pinto beans with some kind of meat in them sometimes but usually not. There is a huge bowl of fried potatoes and I know no one will ever fry potatoes as good as those. A big skillet of cornbread sits on a dishrag piping hot, a bowl of red sliced onions and that is usually all there is.
The floor of the kitchen is not level. In fact the table is slanted so far on the uneven floor that the girl knocks over a glass of something and it runs right down in to the lap of the man across from her. He jumps up and the lady starts cleaning up the mess.
I'm thinking, Boy that girl is in trouble now but strangely the man and woman just smile at her and say “Eat your supper honey, and be more careful”.
What a beautiful scene all of this is as it flashes through my mind. So real that I can feel the dirt on my feet and smell the beans and cornbread, fried taters and red onions. Only to realize that here I sit looking out at a very different scene, and none of that is real. Kind of sad until I remember that I can go again anytime I wish and once again be drawn in to that wonderful place that I can call mine. This makes me smile as my heart fills with such wonderful memories of a place exactly like that. Knowing that I grew up there and it all was and is mine makes me overflow with gratitude.
Saturday, July 10, 2010
PROMISE OF GOD.COM...FOUR SEASONS
7-10-10...http://www.promiseofgod.com/four-seasons/
I know a lot of you have read my blogs and some of you have bought my books. Thank you I appreciate you. I recently was accepted by a site that is going to feature some of my stuff on theie site. Below is one of them and I wanted to share it with my friends. I posted it in bulletins this morning but I realizd that I have a bunch of friends here in blogs that are not necessarily on my friends list and wouldn't see my bulletin. Please click below. I hope you like it. If it won't open for you please let me know. Love to all Clydene
I know a lot of you have read my blogs and some of you have bought my books. Thank you I appreciate you. I recently was accepted by a site that is going to feature some of my stuff on theie site. Below is one of them and I wanted to share it with my friends. I posted it in bulletins this morning but I realizd that I have a bunch of friends here in blogs that are not necessarily on my friends list and wouldn't see my bulletin. Please click below. I hope you like it. If it won't open for you please let me know. Love to all Clydene
Wednesday, July 7, 2010
CHANGE CAN BE GOOD
7-5-10...CHANGE CAN BE GOOD
Life can be rough but it can also be wonderful. It really comes down to the way we handle all the fears, hurts, hopes, dreams, and everyday problems that we are sure to face. Just when things are smooth on the road you can be sure that there will be a bump up ahead that is totally going to wreck your cart and all the things that were good are going to come spilling out in a great big heap. What counts is how you handle the spill. You can scream and holler about all the injustices of your life and just leave it lying there, or you can stop, pick it up, and start over.
Many times I have just gone on and let it lay but I always had to come back and clean it up. It's always harder that way so I try to always clean up as I go. Mamma always told me that if I made a mess to clean it up as I go. That way when it is done, it is done.
NO one person will ever view things exactly the way I do, do the things I do, or think the things I think. I learned very early on that there is no way I can bend someone's will and change what the say, do, think, or what they want. We all all unique and different. I can't for the life of me why everyone in the world aren't scrambling for a big plate of fried Okra. I love it. It is delicious to me. I hate Summer and the intense miserable heat it brings and I love winter with it's beautiful snow and ice. I just can't comprehend anyone liking to get their brains baked in the hot summer sun.
God made us all different just the way he wanted each one to be. We all all special to Him. We are the very first High Tech Computers ever built with every part having it's own use in the scheme of things. We are what we are and none of us have a right to push our thoughts and beliefs on anyone else yet we all do try at times.
I've tried to change, I've tried to change others. It doesn't work. We need to be happy with who we are and where we are. Everyone has the same rights and chances that I do. I have accepted me and I have accepted that everyone else has that same right. It is a sad thing that we have to be older before we accept things. I guess we are like they say about fine wine, It's better with age.
I love God, family, friends, Fall, Winter, snow, and a nice warm fire to name a few. I hate liars, being lied to, being lied about, being called a liar, bullies, and summer. As long as I keep the love list longer than the hate list I figure I'm OK and I am satisfied.
My perspective on a lot of things has done a complete turn about. That fact in no way means that I am a different, a better, or a worse person. I'm still just a plain ol' Country girl who talks funny to some and likes Pinto beans, fried taters , okra. Red onions sour pickles, Cole slaw and cornbread. I'm just me and I'm still here. YEP!
Life can be rough but it can also be wonderful. It really comes down to the way we handle all the fears, hurts, hopes, dreams, and everyday problems that we are sure to face. Just when things are smooth on the road you can be sure that there will be a bump up ahead that is totally going to wreck your cart and all the things that were good are going to come spilling out in a great big heap. What counts is how you handle the spill. You can scream and holler about all the injustices of your life and just leave it lying there, or you can stop, pick it up, and start over.
Many times I have just gone on and let it lay but I always had to come back and clean it up. It's always harder that way so I try to always clean up as I go. Mamma always told me that if I made a mess to clean it up as I go. That way when it is done, it is done.
NO one person will ever view things exactly the way I do, do the things I do, or think the things I think. I learned very early on that there is no way I can bend someone's will and change what the say, do, think, or what they want. We all all unique and different. I can't for the life of me why everyone in the world aren't scrambling for a big plate of fried Okra. I love it. It is delicious to me. I hate Summer and the intense miserable heat it brings and I love winter with it's beautiful snow and ice. I just can't comprehend anyone liking to get their brains baked in the hot summer sun.
God made us all different just the way he wanted each one to be. We all all special to Him. We are the very first High Tech Computers ever built with every part having it's own use in the scheme of things. We are what we are and none of us have a right to push our thoughts and beliefs on anyone else yet we all do try at times.
I've tried to change, I've tried to change others. It doesn't work. We need to be happy with who we are and where we are. Everyone has the same rights and chances that I do. I have accepted me and I have accepted that everyone else has that same right. It is a sad thing that we have to be older before we accept things. I guess we are like they say about fine wine, It's better with age.
I love God, family, friends, Fall, Winter, snow, and a nice warm fire to name a few. I hate liars, being lied to, being lied about, being called a liar, bullies, and summer. As long as I keep the love list longer than the hate list I figure I'm OK and I am satisfied.
My perspective on a lot of things has done a complete turn about. That fact in no way means that I am a different, a better, or a worse person. I'm still just a plain ol' Country girl who talks funny to some and likes Pinto beans, fried taters , okra. Red onions sour pickles, Cole slaw and cornbread. I'm just me and I'm still here. YEP!
THE RABBIT HUNT
7-4-10...THE RABBIT HUNT
As I have aged things have changed with me. I no longer dream of the future and all the great things I'm going to achieve. I am happy with the way things are most of the time. My perspective on most things has done a complete turn about.
My resistance to things like, problems, adversities, feelings, indeed my body does not respond to pain the way it always did. My feelings are much more easy to hurt and I'm finding the least thing and I go on a crying pity party. You would think that I'd have developed a shell hard as nails and not petratable by no but no I'm very vulnerable to everything and I detest that.
My Parents taught me to get up dust off my britches and keep on keeping on no matter how far my face was pushed in to the mud. I thought I would always do that and I built a wall between me and things that wanted to harm me. Somewhere or someone along the way tore my wall down and I became weak and mellow as a kitten. My fire is gone it seems. It was such a subtle thing that I didn't notice it. Getting older and losing resilience was kinda like getting fat, someone had to point it out to me.
When I get in this mode and seem to lose my fight all I need to do is start using my ability to go on back there in my child-hood and reminiscence about things. That'll do it every time but because of my slower reflexes it takes me a bit longer now.
My Grandpa (Pappa) Thomas was an honery old cuss and never a bore to be around. He told us many things that were less than the truth just for fun. Mamma didn't like it one bit but we had fun with him. He told us things like a brown cow gives chocolate milk and the moon was made of cheese and we had to have it proved to us that Pappa was just funning with us. When he told us that if we sprinkled salt on a rabbits tail we could catch it he very nearly got everyone in a bunch of trouble.
One day Brenda and I decided we would catch us a pet rabbit by golly and we knew just how to do it. We were afraid Mamma would miss her salt shaker so we just took the box and off we went. It didn't take long to find a rabbit and if you are familiar with their actions you will know that you can walk almost up to the rabbit before it hops away. I think they kind of sniff out what you are up to doing by instinct or they just like to play tag.
Here we went through the pasture chasing that critter with it staying just a bit ahead of us. The salt was flying through the air. We sneaked, it hopped. When we ran out of salt and gave up we started back home. But wait a darn minute here, which way is back? We hadn't been watching where we were going and though things looked familiar we had gone without watching and we didn't know which way was back home. We had gone a whole bunch farther than we ever had before and there was two 6 year old's lost as two gooses in a fox den. As was typical with Brenda she started hanging on to me, ripping my clothes, and we both wet our britches.
"Brenda turn loose of me you are pinching my arm", but she just dug in deeper. I was never quiet as brave as I acted but Brenda brought out something in me that made me dig in my heels. (I need some of that heel digging right now.) I said "Brenda start screaming, maybe they'll hear us". They heard us all right but the one who heard us was the old ragged man who lived in a haunted house way down in the woods by the tracks. Pappa had told us all about him. Sure He Had! and there wasn't a scrap of truth to it. Pappa always said he was gonna toughen us up and between his stories and my protectiveness of Brenda it did toughen me up.
At least when the old man came up to us we had some sense of where we were. "Run Brenda" I hollered. Well heck fire Brenda was holding on to my arm in a death grip and I was dragging her. I stopped abruptly and of course it had a sling shot affect on Brenda. She went flying past me and now she was dragging me. I mean that girl was moving on now. "Brenda, you're going the wrong way, stop". She stopped and this time I was in the sling shot smack dab in to that old man. We all went down. "Well Brenda you done it this time. He's got us now".
Poor old man had the wind knocked out of him but he was trying to laugh. That just scared us worse. He said "You girls get up off me and I'm gonna to take you home". It took some convincing on his part but we finally figured out he was a good old man even if he did stink and live in a shack. Heck his house wasn't haunted either he said. He led us up to where we could see Brenda's house, patted our backs and he was on his way.
Now we hadn't been gone long but Mamma was looking for us. We told her our story (by the way Brenda still had a vice grip on my arm). We got in trouble for taking her salt, after all a box of salt cost 10 cents and money didn't grow on trees she said.
Next time Pappa came for a visit he was told in no uncertain terms to stop lying to her kids. Pappa really thought it was funny but he knew Mamma meant business so he didn't argue with her at all. I'm not sure if he told us any more of his tales but if he did I don't remember any more run-a-ways because of it. Shoot fire, we didn't even catch that rabbit!!!
As I have aged things have changed with me. I no longer dream of the future and all the great things I'm going to achieve. I am happy with the way things are most of the time. My perspective on most things has done a complete turn about.
My resistance to things like, problems, adversities, feelings, indeed my body does not respond to pain the way it always did. My feelings are much more easy to hurt and I'm finding the least thing and I go on a crying pity party. You would think that I'd have developed a shell hard as nails and not petratable by no but no I'm very vulnerable to everything and I detest that.
My Parents taught me to get up dust off my britches and keep on keeping on no matter how far my face was pushed in to the mud. I thought I would always do that and I built a wall between me and things that wanted to harm me. Somewhere or someone along the way tore my wall down and I became weak and mellow as a kitten. My fire is gone it seems. It was such a subtle thing that I didn't notice it. Getting older and losing resilience was kinda like getting fat, someone had to point it out to me.
When I get in this mode and seem to lose my fight all I need to do is start using my ability to go on back there in my child-hood and reminiscence about things. That'll do it every time but because of my slower reflexes it takes me a bit longer now.
My Grandpa (Pappa) Thomas was an honery old cuss and never a bore to be around. He told us many things that were less than the truth just for fun. Mamma didn't like it one bit but we had fun with him. He told us things like a brown cow gives chocolate milk and the moon was made of cheese and we had to have it proved to us that Pappa was just funning with us. When he told us that if we sprinkled salt on a rabbits tail we could catch it he very nearly got everyone in a bunch of trouble.
One day Brenda and I decided we would catch us a pet rabbit by golly and we knew just how to do it. We were afraid Mamma would miss her salt shaker so we just took the box and off we went. It didn't take long to find a rabbit and if you are familiar with their actions you will know that you can walk almost up to the rabbit before it hops away. I think they kind of sniff out what you are up to doing by instinct or they just like to play tag.
Here we went through the pasture chasing that critter with it staying just a bit ahead of us. The salt was flying through the air. We sneaked, it hopped. When we ran out of salt and gave up we started back home. But wait a darn minute here, which way is back? We hadn't been watching where we were going and though things looked familiar we had gone without watching and we didn't know which way was back home. We had gone a whole bunch farther than we ever had before and there was two 6 year old's lost as two gooses in a fox den. As was typical with Brenda she started hanging on to me, ripping my clothes, and we both wet our britches.
"Brenda turn loose of me you are pinching my arm", but she just dug in deeper. I was never quiet as brave as I acted but Brenda brought out something in me that made me dig in my heels. (I need some of that heel digging right now.) I said "Brenda start screaming, maybe they'll hear us". They heard us all right but the one who heard us was the old ragged man who lived in a haunted house way down in the woods by the tracks. Pappa had told us all about him. Sure He Had! and there wasn't a scrap of truth to it. Pappa always said he was gonna toughen us up and between his stories and my protectiveness of Brenda it did toughen me up.
At least when the old man came up to us we had some sense of where we were. "Run Brenda" I hollered. Well heck fire Brenda was holding on to my arm in a death grip and I was dragging her. I stopped abruptly and of course it had a sling shot affect on Brenda. She went flying past me and now she was dragging me. I mean that girl was moving on now. "Brenda, you're going the wrong way, stop". She stopped and this time I was in the sling shot smack dab in to that old man. We all went down. "Well Brenda you done it this time. He's got us now".
Poor old man had the wind knocked out of him but he was trying to laugh. That just scared us worse. He said "You girls get up off me and I'm gonna to take you home". It took some convincing on his part but we finally figured out he was a good old man even if he did stink and live in a shack. Heck his house wasn't haunted either he said. He led us up to where we could see Brenda's house, patted our backs and he was on his way.
Now we hadn't been gone long but Mamma was looking for us. We told her our story (by the way Brenda still had a vice grip on my arm). We got in trouble for taking her salt, after all a box of salt cost 10 cents and money didn't grow on trees she said.
Next time Pappa came for a visit he was told in no uncertain terms to stop lying to her kids. Pappa really thought it was funny but he knew Mamma meant business so he didn't argue with her at all. I'm not sure if he told us any more of his tales but if he did I don't remember any more run-a-ways because of it. Shoot fire, we didn't even catch that rabbit!!!
Thursday, June 24, 2010
TYPICAL 50'S? NOPE!
6-23-10...TYPICAL 50's? NOPE!
We keep hearing and seeing things about the 50's right now because of the Boomers. I watch things on TV from that era if I can find them because almost all I see on TV or in the movies is just plain trash to my way of thinking. I watch , Andy Griffith, The Waltons, and Little House on The Prairie ,to name a few, and hear them say that was typical of that time. I was watching Leave it To Beaver at the time and I thought, “Typical”? HUH? You gotta be kidding me. Beavers Mother was wearing high heels, beautiful dress, & jewelry as she busied herself in her neat little kitchen with all the modern conveniences, some of which were definitely not typical. When Father comes home she calls up the stairs, where for some reason the writers thought kids stayed in their rooms all the time, “Boys dinner's ready”. Now she has Dinner ready just as the Father comes in the door and on the table. She goes walking like a fashion model over to him as he comes in the door and says, “Hello dear dinners ready. How was your day?” He kisses her and says,”Very good and how was your day dear.” Right about now I think I might puke when the boys come in to the kitchen, kiss mom on the cheek and say ,”Looks good Mom, Can I do anything to help? Then when Dinner is over Beaver and Wally say “May I be excused Mom, I'm finished”? Oh Good Grief! A typical evening was no where near that in my home or in any body's home that I knew of. I'm thinking some imbecile is writing this. Even The Waltons and Little house were too sugar coated but a little closer to the way it really was.
At my house, my Daddy came dragging in, worn out from a days hard labor with a pittance of pay. Mamma is getting 'Supper' on the table. That doesn't take long because we don't have a big table full of fancy food. Just some beans and potatoes and corn-bread usually. . There is always someone there to eat with us. Whether Family or stranger there was always someone else there in our house. Norman and I are certainly not up in our 'Rooms' we go there to sleep, we are outside playing or in the front room doing something with our hands and our minds because there wasn't a TV to be parked in front of. Mamma is usually bare foot and wearing an old house dress that has worn so thin she figures it will disintegrate when it is washed again. Mamma hollers, “You kids wash your hands and get to the table”. We all assemble at the table and we are very thankful for what we have. Sometimes we'd like something else but we don't stress out over not having it. And we wouldn't dare say anything like, I don't like this stuff. Give me something else cause I'm not eating this like I heard someone say recently. Heck no. If we were to act that way we'd be whacked a time or two and told to apologize to Mamma for our rudeness.. Norman or I always spilled something ALWAYS, and it was usually ol' butterfingers me. When we all got to the table and got our plates filled the chattering starts and we have good Family time. Now how in the world could any one believe that the Beaver Show was typical is beyond me cause honey it aint nowhere close to typical in the real world I grew up in. NOPE!!!!
We keep hearing and seeing things about the 50's right now because of the Boomers. I watch things on TV from that era if I can find them because almost all I see on TV or in the movies is just plain trash to my way of thinking. I watch , Andy Griffith, The Waltons, and Little House on The Prairie ,to name a few, and hear them say that was typical of that time. I was watching Leave it To Beaver at the time and I thought, “Typical”? HUH? You gotta be kidding me. Beavers Mother was wearing high heels, beautiful dress, & jewelry as she busied herself in her neat little kitchen with all the modern conveniences, some of which were definitely not typical. When Father comes home she calls up the stairs, where for some reason the writers thought kids stayed in their rooms all the time, “Boys dinner's ready”. Now she has Dinner ready just as the Father comes in the door and on the table. She goes walking like a fashion model over to him as he comes in the door and says, “Hello dear dinners ready. How was your day?” He kisses her and says,”Very good and how was your day dear.” Right about now I think I might puke when the boys come in to the kitchen, kiss mom on the cheek and say ,”Looks good Mom, Can I do anything to help? Then when Dinner is over Beaver and Wally say “May I be excused Mom, I'm finished”? Oh Good Grief! A typical evening was no where near that in my home or in any body's home that I knew of. I'm thinking some imbecile is writing this. Even The Waltons and Little house were too sugar coated but a little closer to the way it really was.
At my house, my Daddy came dragging in, worn out from a days hard labor with a pittance of pay. Mamma is getting 'Supper' on the table. That doesn't take long because we don't have a big table full of fancy food. Just some beans and potatoes and corn-bread usually. . There is always someone there to eat with us. Whether Family or stranger there was always someone else there in our house. Norman and I are certainly not up in our 'Rooms' we go there to sleep, we are outside playing or in the front room doing something with our hands and our minds because there wasn't a TV to be parked in front of. Mamma is usually bare foot and wearing an old house dress that has worn so thin she figures it will disintegrate when it is washed again. Mamma hollers, “You kids wash your hands and get to the table”. We all assemble at the table and we are very thankful for what we have. Sometimes we'd like something else but we don't stress out over not having it. And we wouldn't dare say anything like, I don't like this stuff. Give me something else cause I'm not eating this like I heard someone say recently. Heck no. If we were to act that way we'd be whacked a time or two and told to apologize to Mamma for our rudeness.. Norman or I always spilled something ALWAYS, and it was usually ol' butterfingers me. When we all got to the table and got our plates filled the chattering starts and we have good Family time. Now how in the world could any one believe that the Beaver Show was typical is beyond me cause honey it aint nowhere close to typical in the real world I grew up in. NOPE!!!!
Tuesday, June 22, 2010
BRENDA AND CLYDENE
6-21-10...BRENDA
A lot of you probably feel like you know my Cousin Brenda because I write about her a lot. We are only 7 months a part in age and grew up side by side almost. Our homes were in hollerin' distance. Really I think of her as my Sister and she feels the same way. We are probably closer than a lot of real Sisters
We had fun and laughter together with our Brothers Norman and Paul when we were kids. As we grew and aged and became teenagers, Adults, and now senior citizens our closeness just got stronger.
Brenda got married a lot younger than I did and moved 350 miles away with her husband. At the time I could have cheerfully choked the life out of her husband and later I had good reason not to like him. I missed her so very bad and I was so lost without her for a while that I actually grieved like she was no longer living. Of course I pulled out of that but when Brenda started having problems with her abusive Husband I was there for her just as she was for me later when I had the same problems. First sign of trouble for either of us and we gravitated to each other like a homing pigeon. We could even feel in our hearts when the other one was in trouble and here we'd go like ol' sittin' hens to right what was wrong. It was always that way and it was the one sure and steady thing in our lives for many years.
We are both older and ill now. Not able to travel but we always could talk over the phone. Brenda doesn't tell me but I know her and I know she is more than ill because most times she doesn't even feel like talking on the phone. Her Brother has been to visit her and he said she is not doing well at all. Neither of us are able to travel the 350 miles to visit so that is the way it is.
I'm sure you have all been there when everything comes falling in on your head at the same time. That is where I am. I need Brenda and Brenda needs me and there is not a darn thing we can do about it. Brenda knows I love her and I know she loves me so that will have to be enough. I don't think over all these 66 years we ever once thought about what this time would mean to us. I wrote Brenda a long letter letting her know that I will always be there in my heart for her.
A lot of you probably feel like you know my Cousin Brenda because I write about her a lot. We are only 7 months a part in age and grew up side by side almost. Our homes were in hollerin' distance. Really I think of her as my Sister and she feels the same way. We are probably closer than a lot of real Sisters
We had fun and laughter together with our Brothers Norman and Paul when we were kids. As we grew and aged and became teenagers, Adults, and now senior citizens our closeness just got stronger.
Brenda got married a lot younger than I did and moved 350 miles away with her husband. At the time I could have cheerfully choked the life out of her husband and later I had good reason not to like him. I missed her so very bad and I was so lost without her for a while that I actually grieved like she was no longer living. Of course I pulled out of that but when Brenda started having problems with her abusive Husband I was there for her just as she was for me later when I had the same problems. First sign of trouble for either of us and we gravitated to each other like a homing pigeon. We could even feel in our hearts when the other one was in trouble and here we'd go like ol' sittin' hens to right what was wrong. It was always that way and it was the one sure and steady thing in our lives for many years.
We are both older and ill now. Not able to travel but we always could talk over the phone. Brenda doesn't tell me but I know her and I know she is more than ill because most times she doesn't even feel like talking on the phone. Her Brother has been to visit her and he said she is not doing well at all. Neither of us are able to travel the 350 miles to visit so that is the way it is.
I'm sure you have all been there when everything comes falling in on your head at the same time. That is where I am. I need Brenda and Brenda needs me and there is not a darn thing we can do about it. Brenda knows I love her and I know she loves me so that will have to be enough. I don't think over all these 66 years we ever once thought about what this time would mean to us. I wrote Brenda a long letter letting her know that I will always be there in my heart for her.
Saturday, June 19, 2010
I CAME FROM GOOD STOCK
6-19-10...I CAME FROM GOOD STOCK
My life has not been easy, it has been tough to say the least. I've had more than my share of hard knocks. I don't have the corner market on that I know. Many people have had that kind of life. Mamma always told me that no matter how bad things were I could always look around and find someone in worse condition. I know that is true but that don't make my situation any better by knowing that fact.
My one Ace in the hole has always been to always get up no matter how hard I am knocked down and I've always done that. But don't everyone have the right to stay down and rest a spell now and then? Nope, I don't think that is the way it goes. I have gotten up when I thought it was impossible but I am tired now. You'd think that in those Golden Years they always talk about things would get easier. Not the case. So if you are younger and still out there working just don't think Retirement will be like you've read about or seen on TV. Could be it will for a few but I've not seen many my age who will brag about their leisure days of retirement. I do know some. In fact some I know right here on The Hill. I'm envious of them sometimes and Mamma taught me not to be that way either. Mamma had a beautiful peaceful smile right up to the day she passed in to Heaven even though her pain was enormous. Wow, What an inspiration that Lady was for me. I try to maintain a smile and a happy word for everyone because that was the way my Mamma taught me but it is getting harder and harder.
I miss my Daddy and Mamma so bad it hurts deep in my heart sometimes. Daddy was my inspiration also. He started ploughing fields young. Pappy took him out of school when he was in the second grade and he never got to go back. Daddy worked hard from then on and was never able to let up for a minute so why should I think I have that right now? Daddy was old before his time and his heart stopped when he was only 68 years old. I'm just a little over two years younger than that right now.
My smile is faded for a while but I have no doubt I will have it back soon. I came from good stock and life wont keep me down for long. That is my encouragement at the moment. Yep, I came from good stock by golly and I aint gonna forget that as long as I've got a mind with some limited capacity. NOPE!!!
My life has not been easy, it has been tough to say the least. I've had more than my share of hard knocks. I don't have the corner market on that I know. Many people have had that kind of life. Mamma always told me that no matter how bad things were I could always look around and find someone in worse condition. I know that is true but that don't make my situation any better by knowing that fact.
My one Ace in the hole has always been to always get up no matter how hard I am knocked down and I've always done that. But don't everyone have the right to stay down and rest a spell now and then? Nope, I don't think that is the way it goes. I have gotten up when I thought it was impossible but I am tired now. You'd think that in those Golden Years they always talk about things would get easier. Not the case. So if you are younger and still out there working just don't think Retirement will be like you've read about or seen on TV. Could be it will for a few but I've not seen many my age who will brag about their leisure days of retirement. I do know some. In fact some I know right here on The Hill. I'm envious of them sometimes and Mamma taught me not to be that way either. Mamma had a beautiful peaceful smile right up to the day she passed in to Heaven even though her pain was enormous. Wow, What an inspiration that Lady was for me. I try to maintain a smile and a happy word for everyone because that was the way my Mamma taught me but it is getting harder and harder.
I miss my Daddy and Mamma so bad it hurts deep in my heart sometimes. Daddy was my inspiration also. He started ploughing fields young. Pappy took him out of school when he was in the second grade and he never got to go back. Daddy worked hard from then on and was never able to let up for a minute so why should I think I have that right now? Daddy was old before his time and his heart stopped when he was only 68 years old. I'm just a little over two years younger than that right now.
My smile is faded for a while but I have no doubt I will have it back soon. I came from good stock and life wont keep me down for long. That is my encouragement at the moment. Yep, I came from good stock by golly and I aint gonna forget that as long as I've got a mind with some limited capacity. NOPE!!!
Tuesday, June 8, 2010
MAD AS HECK
6-8-10...I'm MAD AS HECK!!
I was watching the news this morning and saw something that just broke my heart. It made me physically sick to my stomach.
They were showing a video of a little three year old girl doing a “Dance?” to a Lady Ga Ga song. I had never even heard of this Lady Ga Ga until I started seeing little girls imitate her. The Mother was being interviewed and she thought this it was perfectly fine for all the sickos of the world to watch her precious little three year old daughter all painted up and dancing suggestively. Now I may be called a nerd or whatever it is they call us now but I'm Proud I've earned that title.
What has happened to Parents who protected their kids boy or girl? I just can't comprehend where their minds could be. Don't they realize what could happen to these beautiful little girls? Didn't they learn anything from Jon Benet Ramsey? It is the parents who enjoy this stuff not the kids. It is the parents that push their kids in to this stuff like beauty contests where babies are dressed to look like floosies. The kids don't want to do it. Parents even make their kids go on diets so their bodies can look “Sexy” or whatever it is they are trying to achieve. What kind of people will these little precious kids become when their parents take their innocence away from them like that? They shouldn't even see things like that at their age.
I appreciate my Parents and the way they raised me more every day. I was never exposed to anything like this and though I was called square in my youth and didn't like it then I love it now. I'm a square still and I shudder to think what is going to happen to these little innocent, beautiful children. It makes me more than sick to my stomach it makes me madder than I have ever been in my life. It makes me want to knock some sense in to those knuckle headed parents.
There I got that off my chest!!!
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