MY SHOPPING TRIP

7-3-08...MY SHOPPING TRIP

I had put it off as long as I could. I had to go to the grocery store this morning. I guess I started out with the wrong attitude but I dread that with a purple passion' If you have never heard about those purple passions it's just a slang that all the teens used in my day over 50 years ago. Anyway it is a dreaded thing. If I catch you sparking with my boy friend I'll hate you with a purple passinn for example. Well with that said lets get back to my shopping trip. I never once thought about this being the day before the 4th. of July. The stores were packed like sardines. It was awful!! People pushing, grabbing, shouting, ect. Hey guys it will be Independence Day Tomorrow, not the beginning of a war. I was knocked in the shin with a cart, elbowed in the rib, scowled at. You name it. I am a smiler (is that how you spell it?) oh well I always smile at people. I smiled until my jaws ached and not one person smiled back. How rude. I wouldn't have minded the skinned shin so much if the person would have just said I'm sorry, Are you OK? Instead she scowled at me when I said excuse me. Hey, I needed some bread flower also and there are a bunch more of them on the shelf. My Goodness Gracious why are people so impatient? DOES ANYONE KNOW? Not me for sure. "Just around the corner I stopped to get me a can of that there Butter flavored crisco. That stuff sure makes good pie crusts and makes those fried green tomatoes scrumptous. It was on the bottom shelf so I turned loose of my cart and reached down to fetch me a can. Almost had to stand on my head to get it. Anyway, I raised up just in time to see my cart roll over across the aisle and hit this young man right on his backside. He jumped straight up in the air and hollered "WHOOOPS". Well I'm also a giggler and I got tickled. I was standing there cackling like an old hen who just layed a double yoker. The man was looking at me like he'd just love to box my ears and I was giggling between saying,--- " giggle, Oh I'm sorry. giggle, It rolled giggle into you giggle giggle. I really didn't giggle giggle giggle, do it on giggle giggle purpose. He said "WELL MY GOSH ( WELL NOT IN THOSE EXACT WORDS! But you get the gist of it) "You scared me to death, I wasn't planning on gettin' attacked by a crazy old woman's shopping cart. I said "GIGGLE GIGGLE GIGGLE, I'm so sorry sir but surely you don't think I did that on purpose." He scowled some more and let out more of those ugly words and by then my purple passion was spewing over and the Giggling had sure stopped. People were gathering, the manager of the store had arrived on the scene. I thought Oh My Oh My I guess I'll go to jail now. The guy my cart hit was a very nice looking young man. I am old enough to be his Mom. Well my purple passion went by the wayside and the Mother in me kicked in. I said, " I'll tell you what Young Man, If you were My Son I'd turn you over my knee right here and blister your bottom till you would have something to think about. The very Idea that a nice looking young man like you would be in here treating people like that. Now I told you I was sorry and that I didn't do that on purpose, now you tell me how to get in touch with your Parents. I guess I must have looked quiet a sight standing there under that big tall young man and blessing him out. I think everyone in the store had shown up to watch and they all burst out cheering and talking at once. I thought they were going to beat me to death patting me on the back but I was still swinging my purse around and looking at that boy. (NO I WASN'T GOING TO HIT HIM WITH MY PURSE) He just burst out laughing and grabbed me and gave me a big ol' hug and said Mam' I never met such a spunky lady in my life you remind me of my Grandmother. ( well I'd a drather he'd a said Mother) I hugged him back and we chatted a while. I checked out my groceries, he hugged me again and I crawled in my car and came home Hey, I had a wonderful shopping trip even though I started out with a bad attitude. Wouldn't Ya' agree? BUT WHY DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO ME?????